How many of you out there like waiting for answers?
Yeah… me either.
This is something that I have really, really…. REALLY, struggled with since I was little. Patience and I have never really gotten along well. Trust me. You know those parents who have stories about how their kid was always jumping around, doing what they wanted, when they wanted, never wanting to sit still and not being able to just simply “wait”… yeah those would be my parents 100%! I know, most people probably think that impatience is just a phase and that you grow out of it as you grow up… WRONG. I have to pray to God everyday, sometimes several times a day, to help me relax and not be so impatient. It is 100% something that does not come natural to me.
When I was younger, I had to have minor surgery. Now, I had never in my life had any kind of surgery up to this point, so naturally, I had no idea what to expect and I was a huge sack of nerves on the day. I remember “coming to” after my surgery and kind of freaking out. I had no idea where I was, I was super confused and in loads of pain. One thing I remember is the doctors telling my mom that I would need to be on bed rest for a few days and that it would be at least a week or so before I would be able to be out and about or even eat normally.
Literally the next day I was out of bed, walking around, going outside, texting my best-friend to see if she could hang out, etc. I did not want to be / was not going to be “chained” to my bed. Of course, after about 3 PM that day, I felt like I was dying. I have since learned that sometimes, our bodies need to rest. No matter how impatient you are, your body will MAKE you rest if pushed too far.
I am stubborn and impatient, I will own that. I’m not one who enjoys waiting for answers, for surprises, for injuries to heal, etc. This is something, like I said before, that has not gone away as I’ve grown older. I have to work on my patience Every. Single. Day. Waiting is something that I have found myself doing a whole lot of over the last year or so.
I’m talking about waiting on God. Waiting to see what I’m supposed to do next in this crazy thing we call life, to see what sparks my interest or motivates me, waiting to see what God has planned for my life. I can not tell you how many times I have prayed to God that he would show me what I am meant to be doing. Asking Him if I will ever find my purpose in life? Wondering, will I ever find something that I’m good at doing, that I can make a living ($) doing, and that I will truly love doing? Does such a combo even exist?
Want to know the answers I got as I prayed about this for over a year?
Until one day, I got an answer. It was like someone (God) had finally picked up the phone and I literally heard a voice. Clear as day.
It said to me,
Now, that may not sound like much to you, but for me, it was everything. Writing and I go way, way back. When I was in my very early teens, I wrote my first “novel”, never seen by anyone’s eyes but my own of course. I believe that “novel” was something like 10-12 chapters, which I wrote with a pencil, in a 100 page, single subject, wide ruled, light pink notebook while on vacation with my family. LOL. I was always the “geeky” girl who loved, and I mean loved, writing papers in school. While I was in high school and university, I wrote for the yearbook and newspaper. In university, I even majored in English Lit/Creative Writing. I absolutely loved to write, it was kind of my escape, and I loved that I was good at it. However, that was quite some time ago.
So, me, the girl who needs all the answers and doesn’t like to wait, heard this voice say “Write.” and do you know what I said…
“Write about what? Write where and to whom? Who would even read something I wrote? Am I supposed to write a book? I don’t know how to write a “real” book. I’m not a professional writer. How in the world would I even get something published? I can’t do that. I don’t have the resources. I’m not creative like I use to be. I probably won’t even be any good anymore.”
Before I had written a single word, I had talked myself out of even trying. A few weeks later, I was going about my day and I had a moment. I had just finished the dishes and I was looking around wondering what to do next. And I swear, I heard that voice again. It said the same thing.
This time I thought, okay maybe there’s something to this. So I sat down, and I wrote. I just wrote whatever came to my mind. I believe I wrote a few of my recipes down on a grocery list notepad or something I had lying around. Then I felt sort of pulled towards my laptop, so I opened it up and started typing my recipes into a word document. Then, I had the urge to tell someone why I loved these recipes, and how I like to serve them. I wanted to “talk” to someone about them. So I wrote that stuff down. Then I started wanting to talk about other topics, so I wrote that stuff down. Like I was having a conversation with myself … honestly, I felt a little silly, but I went with it.
Long story short, the next thing I know, I’m creating on a blogging website where I can write about anything and everything!
You see, writing has literally always been my passion. It has always been something I’ve been good at since a young age, and even though I put it down for quite some time, here I am 10+ years after writing my first “novel”, now writing to you guys. To anyone out there reading my little blog.
My point in all of this is that waiting isn’t always bad. Sometimes, we may even already have the answers were looking for and simply not realize it.
I prayed for so long about what I was supposed to do next in my life. Unsure of where my life was going. Feeling like I was always waiting for something and wondering what in the world I was waiting for.
Is there something weighing on your heart today? Maybe a prayer that you keep on praying, but it seems as if God doesn’t hear you? I’m here to tell you, God hears everything. God knows what we’re going to say before we know what we’re going to say. If you feel as though God is making you wait for something, have faith and know there is a very good reason why. God knows exactly what He is doing and all we have to do is trust Him.
Here’s a little something to think about.
The Bible tells us that Moses waited for 40 years before God spoke to him about going and freeing His people from slavery. Abraham waited 75 years before he received the promise of a son and an additional 25 years before he was blessed with his son. David waited 15 years, and endured extremely hard times before he rose to the throne.
If God is making you wait, I promise you, there is a good reason.
I hope you have enjoyed this blog post and learning a little bit more about me. I have tons of great content coming up for you guys so, keep an eye out!
XO my loves,